Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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