I only kidnapped one of them. chill
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
This is the high leading the old right now
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize