whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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