Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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