I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Buhtt sex?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
