I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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