I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize