You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
