Where are you?
In a non slutty way
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
