i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
