Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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