...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Randomize
