I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
