Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
how do you play pong handcuffed?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
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