She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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