HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
im holly from the hills drunk
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
