yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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