She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
