I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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