i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
