so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
This baby is an asshole
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
