Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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