you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
