Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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