Porn is love you can see.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize