THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
pray to the hookup gods
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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