the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
