thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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