Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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