He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
