I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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