susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
