I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
