and you said cock pushups were impossible
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize