Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
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What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
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I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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