After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
