Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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