Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize