so explain again why im purple
no
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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