Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
one might say we're banned from that church
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
