Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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