My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
