Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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