this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
