Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
