He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
