What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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