We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
