I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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