I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
This is my gift to your gina
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
