xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize