If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize